When You Don't Get a Letter
This is for all the SOs waiting for a letter. These last two weeks, I didn’t get any letters from my boyfriend at MCRD San Diego. The last letter he wrote me was a Q&A I made that he sent back. Three weeks ago was the last time I received a real, written letter from him.
When you’re anxiously waiting to hear from your loved one, it can feel like an eternity and the uncertainty of whether or not your recruit is writing can feel excruciating. For the last two weeks, I felt like I went crazy, trying to find outlets to release my stresses. Unfortunately, I ended up suppressing my emotions to an unhealthy point. While I continued to hold out hope that he had written, or that a letter was on its way, the lack of control drove me mad. Mind you, we all have different experiences.
During times like this, you can’t let yourself spiral. Don’t get [too] angry, don’t write a letter in rage and send it (at least without looking over it). Don’t let those doubts take over your thoughts, and find someone to speak to, or a way to verbalize/communicate your frustrations.
I started to wonder whether or not my recruit knew how much I still need him. I do still need him, even if not physically, the reassurance of a letter that says “I love you” puts you on top of the world, and you wonder why you even questioned yourself. You will start to question yourself as you wait for letters, I won’t deny that. You might start having toxic thoughts, fears, anger, etc.
It’s okay. It really is.
Express your emotions – go run, scream, sob, ugly cry, sing, whatever you can to release that negative energy.
But also trust in yourself. I needed a lot of reminding that I was strong and that a letter was still coming. I had so many questions. Did he write? Did my letters get lost? Does he think I’m strong enough to make it through without a letter (the answer to this is yes, but it makes it a lot harder)?
I did end up receiving 4 letters today, but what happened to my mail? My recruit said that he really didn’t have time. During their hour to prepare for the next day, my recruit was still busy and he hated that he couldn’t write. On top of that, he didn’t sneakily write letters when he wasn’t supposed to (so he says), and one of the letters really did come late. Today is December 23 and he wrote me December 8. The letter was postmarked December 11, but didn’t arrive to my mailbox until earlier today. Mail really does get lost or misplaced. During the holidays, the post office is also extremely busy.
It’s rough, not knowing if your recruit is okay. You miss them a lot, and that’s okay too. Just keep your head up as best you can, cry when you need to, scream when you need to, and stay confident that your recruit hasn’t forgotten about you. Your recruit loves you so much, and every day that passes is one day closer to being reunited.
Do you have any questions? Email me coffeecreamcollege@gmail.com
When you’re anxiously waiting to hear from your loved one, it can feel like an eternity and the uncertainty of whether or not your recruit is writing can feel excruciating. For the last two weeks, I felt like I went crazy, trying to find outlets to release my stresses. Unfortunately, I ended up suppressing my emotions to an unhealthy point. While I continued to hold out hope that he had written, or that a letter was on its way, the lack of control drove me mad. Mind you, we all have different experiences.
During times like this, you can’t let yourself spiral. Don’t get [too] angry, don’t write a letter in rage and send it (at least without looking over it). Don’t let those doubts take over your thoughts, and find someone to speak to, or a way to verbalize/communicate your frustrations.
I started to wonder whether or not my recruit knew how much I still need him. I do still need him, even if not physically, the reassurance of a letter that says “I love you” puts you on top of the world, and you wonder why you even questioned yourself. You will start to question yourself as you wait for letters, I won’t deny that. You might start having toxic thoughts, fears, anger, etc.
It’s okay. It really is.
Express your emotions – go run, scream, sob, ugly cry, sing, whatever you can to release that negative energy.
But also trust in yourself. I needed a lot of reminding that I was strong and that a letter was still coming. I had so many questions. Did he write? Did my letters get lost? Does he think I’m strong enough to make it through without a letter (the answer to this is yes, but it makes it a lot harder)?
I did end up receiving 4 letters today, but what happened to my mail? My recruit said that he really didn’t have time. During their hour to prepare for the next day, my recruit was still busy and he hated that he couldn’t write. On top of that, he didn’t sneakily write letters when he wasn’t supposed to (so he says), and one of the letters really did come late. Today is December 23 and he wrote me December 8. The letter was postmarked December 11, but didn’t arrive to my mailbox until earlier today. Mail really does get lost or misplaced. During the holidays, the post office is also extremely busy.
It’s rough, not knowing if your recruit is okay. You miss them a lot, and that’s okay too. Just keep your head up as best you can, cry when you need to, scream when you need to, and stay confident that your recruit hasn’t forgotten about you. Your recruit loves you so much, and every day that passes is one day closer to being reunited.
Do you have any questions? Email me coffeecreamcollege@gmail.com
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