4 Ways to Stay Positive

Staying positive during hard times is rough. Most of us just want to curl up in a ball, mope, think of what’s been going on, and isolate ourselves from others. I know that’s what I’m like. Positivity is hard to achieve when you’re hurting or you feel like life is just bleh.

Photo Credits: Gyles B. Photography

But, positivity is achievable. In the recent weeks, I’ve learned to fight against the negativity the pervades my mind (tbh, I’m pretty pessimistic) and turn around those toxic thoughts. How? Keep reading:

1 – Surround yourself with positive people

There will be people in your life that perpetuate this cycle of negativity, allowing you to continuously wallow in self-pity and sadness. You need to know the difference between someone letting you vent, and someone who keeps pushing you to focus only on the negatives. Surround yourself with people who will make you laugh and smile, who don’t cause you hurt or doubt, who support you when you’re down, and know how to appropriately tell what you need to hear. Some people just won’t know how to speak to you, and in fact you might just go against what they advise. Find people who truly know you. And let those people show you the love you need.

2 – Mindset, mindset, mindset

For a long time, I would only focus on negatives, gossip, the worst in all situations and just complain endlessly. Really think about how you can change your way of thinking. For me, it means to stop comparing. For example, I wondered why I wasn’t getting letters from my boyfriend at Marine boot camp when everyone else was, and I started to wonder whether or not he loved me as much as other people loved their significant others. What I started to think was that “you know, I’m confident that he loves me, a letter will come eventually, this isn’t for forever.” I’ve decided that he knows I’m strong enough to not need so many letters, and that no matter what, I know he loves me. It’s all about looking at your situation from a different perspective.

3 – Find the light

Each day is a new day, and each day brings new adventures. Sure, one bad thing could ruin your day, but should you let it? Where’s the light? What good things happened today? For me, someone gave me a discount on food! Was your coffee really good? Did the sun come out? Was it perfect indoor-hot-chocolate-cuddle-with-your-dog weather? Find the light! And even more so, why not make the light? Bake cookies, work out, retail therapy, spa nights, etc.

4 – It’s OKAY to be sad
This tip kind of contradicts what I’ve been saying, but you know, it really is okay to be sad. However, do NOT let yourself stay that way. I gave myself a time period to be sad, and at the end of that time period, I pulled myself up and tried really hard to find ways to improve my mood. Go ahead and wallow, lay down with a blanket wrapped around yourself, and feel all the feels. Don’t let yourself do that forever. Give yourself the time you need, then help yourself the best you can!

Honestly, I’ve had a rough day. I was really anxious about getting zero letters this week from my boyfriend, and my support system has been there to tell me what I’m saying now. They reminded me to stay positive. And when I needed it most, I got a phone call!

I write this in a super positive mindset, I write this as a piece to look back on to see how happy I can be. I write this for all of you who struggle with positivity or finding the light, especially during times you feel like there is no light (like Washington in the winter). Stay positive, you got this!

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