Boyfriend in Bootcamp: Week 3
So, it’s been almost three 3 weeks since my boyfriend left (it’s actually Sunday right now). I remember 3 weeks ago, grabbing dinner with his parents and him, knowing that would be our last night to have fun together before we started this whole military journey. We ate good food, went bowling, and then he and I just spent a few hours together – he held me, wiped my tears away, and just let me talk to him. I really miss him.
Here’s the good news – time has gone by pretty quickly the last couple of weeks. Of course that might stem from the fact that I had midterms, group projects, and other deadlines to meet. I also told myself that if he was going to come back lean and strong that I wanted to get leaner and stronger (gym time)!
Keeping busy really is the key.
I won’t deny wanting to hole up and do nothing for a few days. It’s okay to do that. I felt an emptiness for so long that nothing could really fill it. I distanced myself from people (sorry about those Snapchat streaks!) and focused on myself. Eventually, I just came to a realization that life was still moving and deadlines were hitting me full force.
I still feel overwhelmed. I still feel like doing nothing. All I want is to focus on bettering myself for me and not others. It’s a little bit impossible when you collaborate on so many things though. Part of growing up is doing what you don’t want to do because you can’t let others down.
What’s happened in the last few weeks?
I now have THREE letters from my recruit! I received two on Black Friday (ours, not theirs), and one two weeks after he had left. The letters took 3-4 days (Thanksgiving delayed 2 of them) and both were very short. My recruit says he’s gotten 4 of my letters so far (that was on the November 18th) even though I’ve written him every day.
Write to your recruit every day. They really need it, and don’t listen when people say you’re writing too much. You are their connection to the outside world. You show them love. They don’t get that while they’re in boot camp.
For those ladies/men who are waiting for their first letter, remember that your recruit is busy! Mine said that he had only written to me because that’s all he had time for. Thanksgiving will delay letters, Sundays will also delay letters. KEEP WRITING.
Writing (for me at least) has been therapeutic. I feel connected to my recruit, still able to tell him about my day, knowing he’ll eventually know what I had been up to. I draw him cute pictures, I write some shorter letters when I’m busy, and I even made a hand turkey in honor of Thanksgiving. Keep them encouraged!
My recruit told me to also be honest with him. He says that for me to talk about my hard days helps him because he can still empathize with me. Don’t get me wrong, make your recruit laugh (maybe send some song lyrics) and laugh about what happens to you, too. But also tell him when you’re missing him more than usual, tell him when you feel a little down. Make sure that these parts of the letter are also surrounded by positivity – for your sake.
Life happens. We can’t stop bad things from happening, we can’t help feeling sad, we can’t help getting angry. What we can do is think of the small things that make your day better. Was your coffee really good this morning? Was the weather actually decent? Did you buy anything for Black Friday? Did an old picture of you and your recruit make you smile?
Miss him. That’s okay. Know you’ve got this. That’s okay, too!
Are you’re a military SO? Let’s be friends!
coffeecreamcollege@gmail.com
Here’s the good news – time has gone by pretty quickly the last couple of weeks. Of course that might stem from the fact that I had midterms, group projects, and other deadlines to meet. I also told myself that if he was going to come back lean and strong that I wanted to get leaner and stronger (gym time)!
Keeping busy really is the key.
I won’t deny wanting to hole up and do nothing for a few days. It’s okay to do that. I felt an emptiness for so long that nothing could really fill it. I distanced myself from people (sorry about those Snapchat streaks!) and focused on myself. Eventually, I just came to a realization that life was still moving and deadlines were hitting me full force.
I still feel overwhelmed. I still feel like doing nothing. All I want is to focus on bettering myself for me and not others. It’s a little bit impossible when you collaborate on so many things though. Part of growing up is doing what you don’t want to do because you can’t let others down.
What’s happened in the last few weeks?
I now have THREE letters from my recruit! I received two on Black Friday (ours, not theirs), and one two weeks after he had left. The letters took 3-4 days (Thanksgiving delayed 2 of them) and both were very short. My recruit says he’s gotten 4 of my letters so far (that was on the November 18th) even though I’ve written him every day.
Write to your recruit every day. They really need it, and don’t listen when people say you’re writing too much. You are their connection to the outside world. You show them love. They don’t get that while they’re in boot camp.
For those ladies/men who are waiting for their first letter, remember that your recruit is busy! Mine said that he had only written to me because that’s all he had time for. Thanksgiving will delay letters, Sundays will also delay letters. KEEP WRITING.
Writing (for me at least) has been therapeutic. I feel connected to my recruit, still able to tell him about my day, knowing he’ll eventually know what I had been up to. I draw him cute pictures, I write some shorter letters when I’m busy, and I even made a hand turkey in honor of Thanksgiving. Keep them encouraged!
My recruit told me to also be honest with him. He says that for me to talk about my hard days helps him because he can still empathize with me. Don’t get me wrong, make your recruit laugh (maybe send some song lyrics) and laugh about what happens to you, too. But also tell him when you’re missing him more than usual, tell him when you feel a little down. Make sure that these parts of the letter are also surrounded by positivity – for your sake.
Life happens. We can’t stop bad things from happening, we can’t help feeling sad, we can’t help getting angry. What we can do is think of the small things that make your day better. Was your coffee really good this morning? Was the weather actually decent? Did you buy anything for Black Friday? Did an old picture of you and your recruit make you smile?
Miss him. That’s okay. Know you’ve got this. That’s okay, too!
coffeecreamcollege@gmail.com
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